Tag Archives: Balance

Self Esteem Wave

Riding the Self-Esteem Wave

Self-esteem is how you overall feel about your self.  It does encompass your the value you have for yourself as well as your self-worth.  Contradictory to what we have been led to believe, our self-esteem is not a stagnant way of being.  In fact most people, especially women, experience fluctuations with their self-esteem.

Consider it to fluctuate like the ocean wave.  When you are on the upside of the fluctuation, you feel confident, ready to take on the world; loving who you are, easily seeing your own worth and value.  However when on the downside of the wave you will second guess yourself, having doubt and being overly critical of your self.

Such ups and downs are normal, in fact they are considered as essential as long as you manage them effectively.  Dualities are every where around you; life in itself is with the duality of death.  In fact dualities are everywhere, cannot exist without the other.  The Yin/Yang symbol is one reminder of this.  That dualities which are seemingly opposite or contrary are actually complementary and interconnected.   Thus dualities ~ such as the ups and downs ~ are required to be whole.

The more acceptance you have that your self-esteem will fluctuate,  as well as understanding it is normal, the more likely you are to minimise the depth and frequency of such “waves”.  When you can “ride the wave” you are able to allow flow and surrender.  It is in such surrender that flow naturally occurs as does synchronicity.

It is important to know and accept that when you are on the downside of the fluctuation (wave) this is when your negative emotions, baggage, “stuff”, things you’ve not dealt with are more likely to present.

What exactly are your emotions?  “An emotion is a complex psychological state that involves three distinct components: a subjective experience, a physiological response, and a behavioural or expressive response.”  (Hockenbury & Hockenbury, 2007).

The word emotion originates from the French word “emouvoir” which means to excite.  As well as the Latin word “emovere” which means to move.  Your emotions serve to motivate you to take action (move) towards things that excite you.  Emotions also serve for you to take action in order to survive and thus keep yourself safe from danger.

Running from, not dealing with, or pushing your emotions away only makes them stronger and persistent in trying to get your attention.  It’s the adage,  whatever you resist, persists. Your emotions then control you, rather than you be in control of them.

Whilst it is important to take actions that build your self-esteem, it is also important to understand that the downside of the wave is an important time for you to undertake emotional spring cleaning.

When you seek to understand the reasons as to why the emotions are presenting themselves; by being compassionate and nurturing yourself you loosen their grip in order to achieve release and healing.

Ways to undertake emotional spring cleaning

  1. Acknowledge how you are feeling and what it is you are thinking or focusing on to make you feel that way.  Consider is this just a “story” you are telling yourself and what evidence do you have that it is a truth?  and/or what could be equally if not more so true
  2. Recognise what it is that you need right now and give that to yourself.  Is it loving words of support from  yourself?  Is it time in nature?  To go shopping and treat yourself?  To take time out and go to the beach or to read a good book?
  3. Grab a pen and paper and write.  Consider what event, situation, place or person the emotions relate to and allow the words to flow onto the page, getting raw and honest with  yourself.  How do you feel about what happened?  What has been left unresolved?  What was the impact?  What were the negatives?  and what were the positives (yes there will be some)?  and what are the insights you need to release and let it go?
  4. Find a nice patch of grass or sand and stand on it barefoot.  Connect in with the earth energy and imagine the negative emotions as well as anything that relate to them releasing from your body down through the soles of you feet into the core of the earth where this negativity will be transformed and transmuted.

When you can accept that your self-esteem will fluctuate and that this is normal, as well as be vulnerably brave to address and heal what you need to, you will find that  you have greater distance in between the fluctuations.

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Vibration

Practices to nourish your vibration

As was “goals” in the 1980’s, vibration, manifestation, abundance have all become buzz concepts right now.  As with many concepts that become the “buzz” they tend to become so overused that people soon grow tired of hearing about it.

So why is it important not to get tired about information relating to your vibration?  Science is proving what Eastern philosophies have know for thousands of years; that your body is constructed from energy.  This refers not only to the interactions that occur at a cellular level, yet also to the energy lines that run through your body, called Meridians, which Science can now detect.

What has also been detected is that you are much more than your physical body.  Surrounding you are interconnected fields of energy known as subtle bodies or auric fields.   These fields interact with your physical body via energy connection points called chakras which then feed into the meridians.

Just as you would practice for anything you want to master or become adept at, you also need to follow certain practices to ensure your energy vibration is at it’s best.   Your external world is also a reflection of your internal world so the more you invest in being your best; the more the best of the world will invest in you.

Meditation

Common reasons most people don’t meditate are “I don’t know how to” or “I can’t sit for that long” or “I can’t switch off my mind”.  Meditation is like running a marathon, as in it isn’t something most people can do straight away.  As with training for a marathon you build up your stamina and endurance, so too meditation.  You need to develop your ability to let go of your thoughts and to sit for periods of time.

The benefits of meditation are well documented and from this perspective it is extremely important to recharge all aspects of yourself (physically, mentally and spiritually).  Meditation allows us to be relieved of the density our energy has on Earth.  We are light beings and thus meditation enables us to lighten our energy, thereby lightening our load and connect to the light source that is internal and external to us.

Acknowledge Universal Forces

Whilst I have no concrete evidence that can support for a fact that there are unseen Universal forces that exist, I have experienced many different situations that gives me evidence to believe that they do.

These Universal forces help support us to bring into reality our ecological desires. When we recognise that these Universal forces exist we are able to connect to them to enable manifestation.

Get moving outside

The Latin word “emovere” which means to move is also the basis of the word emotion.  Interestingly it also originates from the French word “emouvoir” which means to excite. When we move, we are exciting our energy and vibration.  Yet to movement also means we tap into emotions and feelings which support us.

When we move outside we are also able to access and absorb the negative ions which exist organically in nature.  These negative ions enable us to be balanced, grounded, energised and to have focus and clarity.

Yin / Yang

The Yin and Yang refer to the negative and positive aspects which exist in everything.  Without both we become imbalanced and/or polarised about a person or situation.  So when you can practice the Yin / Yang, which is seeing both the positives and negatives in equal amounts, then you are able to let go of the attachment and be empowered and at peace.

Be Heart Centred

Studies are showing that the heart emits more frequencies than our brain.  Also that the heart sends more instructions to the brain, than the brain does to the heart.   So when we are heart centred we are able to elevate our communication, thinking, decisions and choices to a higher level of consciousness.

Commonly, in various modalities,  the heart relates to:  self love, love for others, compassion, empathy, forgiveness, acceptance, gratitude, beauty, peace and transformation.  When you focus on doing this for yourself or another you are being heart centred.

Practice Gratefulness

Gratefulness is an important attribute of being heart centred however it is also important from a focus aspect.  To be grateful is to acknowledge all that you are (or can be) thankful and appreciative for.

What ever we focus on, we will get more of.  Also when we are grateful we let the light in, which in-powers us.  It heightens and improves our vibration so we can receive more and in this case more “light”.

We know that everything is interconnected so when you invest in your vibration you are fundamentally investing in all aspects of your well being.  You are being active in creating the way in which you exist in the world.

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Kinesiology

Signs it’s time to see a kinesiologist

A Kinesiologist is an energy medicine specialist. Who places emphasis is on health maintenance, client education and responsibility by identifying the causative influences triggering health (mental, physical, chemical) imbalances.  Anything a Kinesiologist does, or suggests the client does, is to restore health, wellness and vitality, therefore enhancing the clients innate healing energies.

Whilst kinesiology is based on ancient techniques, which have been practised for thousands of years, it is a relatively new modality which was established in the early 1970’s.  Founded on Western philosophies such as Chiropractic, Counselling, Anatomy and Physiology it was coupled with Eastern philosophies such as Meridians, Acupressure, Triad of Health and Chakras.

A fundamental principle of Kinesiology is that the body, mind and spirit has innate ability to heal itself which, at times, needs support to re-align and connect to this innate healing ability.

Humans are three dimensional beings, so it makes sense to use a modality which works on all three aspects, which is what Kinesiology does.  Most modalities are usually only one dimension and in some cases two.  This makes Kinesiology regarded as one of the truly holistic modalities.

So what are the signs which may indicate it’s an ideal time for you to see a kinesiologist?

1.     You’ve experienced a significant loss or change

Any type of loss and/or change can trigger the grief process.  Also loss doesn’t just mean death, it can be a completion of any sort.  Changes or loss can be physically; mentally; spiritually and /or financially.  It may relate to the change or loss of a person; thing and/or place.  Whilst grieving is specific process for the individual kinesiology can support the person through this.

2.     Your over emotional

Many people live with negative emotions, accepting this as their “norm”, which results in them feeling less than great about themselves.  Such feelings may be anxiety, fear, anger, self-doubt, frustration, overwhelm, tiredness / lacking energy, feeling on-edge, sad or teary.  Many of clients have transformed these emotions and transformed their lives.

3.    You are feeling imbalanced

If you describe yourself as feeling “out of sorts”, not “like yourself”, out of harmony and/or imbalanced and don’t have a logical (or medical) reason for feeling this way.   You may also be experiencing stress due to life/work or imbalance.

4.  Your body is giving  you feedback

Our body holds immense wisdom and will give you signs that something isn’t being addressed and thus needs to come back into equilibrium.  Such symptoms may be teeth grinding, insomnia, shortness of breath (for no apparent reason), restlessness, headaches, nail biting, muscle tension or cramping, body aches, stomach upsets or related issues such as bloating, belching, diarrhoea or constipation.

5.    Your neurology is under stress

Signs you are or have experienced neurological stress are brain fogginess, memory issues, loss of balance, co-ordination issues, difficulty concentrating and/or learning, short attention span, disorientation, variances in your vision and/or hearing.

6.  Your internal well being is based on external factors

A sure giveaway that your internal well being is based externally is if you find yourself affected by what people are or aren’t doing and/or who is or isn’t in your life.  Other indicators could be that are you use terminology such as “s/he makes me feel …”, “they did …”, “<x> didn’t happen so I feel …”

7.  Your not living in the now

Are you living in the living in the pain / fear of what has not even happened.  If so it will be resulting in sabotaging behaviour. For example  Tora* wanted to be in a relationship, however she feared being rejected.  When Tora attracts Mr Right there is a 50% chance she may be rejected, however there is also a 50% chance that she may have a loving supportive relationship.    Yet before Tora could even meet Mr Right, she was already living in the pain of being rejected.  *name has been changed for privacy reasons

8.  What you are doing hasn’t or isn’t working

A number of my client have tried one dimensional modalities which, although have worked to some degree, haven’t really helped them shift.  However kinesiology is getting them their desired results.    Whatever it is you are doing, professionally or privately, and it isn’t working then kinesiology might be the right modality to help support your shift.

How to find a kinesiologist

To find a kinesiologist you can search the Australian Kinesiology Association (AKA) website via:  https://www.aka.asn.au.  Check your practitioner is Health Fund registered to ensure their qualifications are current and at the highest industry standard.

You can also book an appointment with me via this link The Inner Sage Availability.  Mention this article to receive a 10% discount.

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Overthinking

Overthinking doing your head in?

Most people will, at some stage, partake in overthinking.   Overthinking, or ruminating as psychology refers to it, is not in itself a bad thing.  In fact overthinking can have its positives.  However it is when overthinking becomes a daily practice then it has negative impacts.

Let’s liken overthinking to chocolate; chocolate isn’t that bad for you when eaten in small amounts occasionally.  It is is dark chocolate with no sugar then it can have health benefits. However when chocolate is eaten everyday and is loaded with sugar then it has negative impacts.

Same too with over thinking.  Overthinking can affect people in such ways as:

  • insomnia
  • exhaustion / low energy
  • poor memory
  • pessimistic and negative attitude
  • inaction / lost opportunities
  • guilt, anxiety and depression
  • stomach issues
  • tension and stress
  • lack of or low self confidence
  • addiction or addictive behaviour
  • impaired problem solving
  • distortion of information leading to inaccurate perceptions

Overthinking is something which typically happens as we get older.  Young children don’t overthink matters, in fact as parents we spend a lot of time trying to teach them to do so.  Young children hold the world in wonder and they are often in the moment, be-ing.

As our children enter school their beautiful, curious, child-like brain becomes jam packed with knowledge and information.   Sir Kenneth Robinson, an international adviser on education, says “we educate people out of their creativity”.

He suggests that not only do we educate our children with knowledge, they also learn the stigmatisation of failure, the linear goal of getting a job done and the fear of being wrong.  Thus their uninhibited creativity becomes restricted.

This fear of failure and/or being “wrong” in general contributes to the reason some people overthink.  Another contribution is the amount of information we have at hand which means we are bombarded with choices.

Whilst it is important to understand what options we have, particularly when making decisions, too much choice can be overwhelming.  Our decision-making process is hindered and we can become enervated and debilitated.

If you are an overthinker, please be easy on yourself.  Apparently the brain is wired in such a way that overthinking is a natural tendency.  Psychologist Susan Nolen-Hoeksema explains “the organization of our brains sets us up for over-thinking”.  This is because our memories and thoughts are not compartmentalised, rather they are interwoven in intricate networks of associations.

Nolen-Hoeksema says “When you are in a bad mood of some type—depressed, anxious, just altogether upset—your bad mood tends to trigger a cascade of thoughts associated with your mood. These thoughts may have nothing to do with the incident that put you into a bad mood in the first place”

Furthermore, when a person is feeling negative they are more likely to focus on negative matters as well as create negative connections, which may not actually exist.  Like any habit, the more a person does this and engages in overthinking, the more likely they will do so in the future.

Mark Nepo said “No amount of thinking is going to stop you from thinking” so in order to break the overthinking habit you need to consider actions which aren’t engaging your thought processes.   You also want to consider actions which will create the positive neural pathways which allow you to access your “sensible” brain; the neocortex.  Actions such as:

  1.  Breathing.  Fear + Oxygen = Excitement
  2.  Meditate regularly (and at least several times per week)
  3.  Instead of talking it over, try writing!  Writing gives us a different perspective
  4.  Practice mindfulness; be-ing in the present moment
  5.  Trust in yourself to handle whatever happens as well as trust in the Universe to only do what is best for you
  6.  Exercise; get moving!
  7.  Thoughts create reality; what are your thoughts creating?
  8.  Get creative; try colouring in, drawing, painting and/or pottery
  9.  Build your spontaneity muscle; it builds your capacity to cope with the unknown
  10.   Know that a choice is just a choice; if your choice doesn’t work out you simply just make another choice
  11.  Feel where in your body your overthinking is affecting you most.  Speak to that part of you and ask what it needs.  Then bring in “sun” vibration ; vitality, illumination, power, energising, happiness and increase will.  Let the sun energy soak into your mind and then into that area releasing what you’ve been thinking about
  12.  STOP IT!  Make a conscious choice not to engage in over thinking.

 

There isn’t a switch which we can access to stop overthinking, however it is a pattern or habit which with a little effort you can change.

If after reading this you feel you need additional support with overthinking then consider kinesiology as an option.  You can find more information on our website.

 

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Living in Balance

Life in its entirety is about balance, living in equilibrium between the opposites and extremes.  It is about the dualities that make up such equilibrium and need to find and maintain the balance between them.

Consider the dualities that surround us, good/bad, black/white, happy/sad,moon/sun, male/female and so on.

In the instance we do not keep the balance then life will find it’s way to ensure we are forced to.  How often has you heard or seen someone who has lived at an extreme, perhaps a workaholic, only to be brought back into balance by a force not under their control, such as retrenchment or illness?

Newton’s Third Law of Motion, “Every action has an equal and opposite reaction”, when we are imbalanced it is natural law that we will experience the opposite reaction in order for balance to be restored.

The familiar Taoist symbol of the yin/yang demonstrates this perfectly.  The yin/yang symbol is a symbol of dualities, dualities that create the whole.  It reminds us that every aspect of life has an equal opposite.  Such as male, female; sun, moon; earth, water; good, bad and positive, negative.  One aspect cannot exist without it’s reverse.

So often in our Western society we have been taught only to view life via one aspect, the good/positive or what was once known as the “Pollyanna outlook”.  Consider most of the early personal development books, they were chiefly about maintaining optimism and that being negative was a “wrong” thing to do.  Yet this in itself creates a pressure and imbalance that can only be reinstated via the equal and opposite reaction…..negativity.

Yet even if we take this symbol and chose to only look at one section, let’s say the white which representative of heaven, light, positive, bliss, masculine, penetrating etc you will notice that there is a reminder that the opposite still exists as in the small dark circle.  This too if you take the other section the black, representative of dark, negative, passive, female and absorbing – the light still exists denoted via the small white circle.

Put simply what this means is that whether you are in a positive or negative experience the opposite energy still exists.  For example if I am feeling really, really amazing I could easily trigger another’s inadequate feelings, yet too if I am feeling low it might be the catalyst for me nurturing myself.  Actually quite a lot of talented people have created their best works when in a low phase, Spike Milligan is a prime example.

It is interesting that in mathmatics when we have a positive and a negative (or equal amounts of each) that they negate each other and are brought back into a neutral position.  Doc Childre, CEO and Founder of HeartMath LLC explains this position of neutral quite eloquently:

“Neutral is a state where you are not jumping ahead too quickly or moving too slow.  Neutral does not mean being inactive, complacent or passive.  It’s about a calm poise that allows for new information and new possibilities to emerge before taking further action.  When in neutral you actually increase your sensitivity and intuitive intelligence.  Neutral is fertile ground for possibilities to grow from”.

Therefore if we wish to live life in a state where we have peace, happiness, unconditional love, balance and neutrality then we simply need to ensure we are in equilibrium and do not have attachment to either the positive or negative.  Uncertainty and disorder occur when one is outweighed by the other.

 

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