Tag Archives: Empowerment

Flattening the emotional curve

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Right now there is so much discussion, and guidelines, on how to flatten the curve. It is just as important that we give the same consideration to flattening the emotional curve.

One of the main reasons it is important to flatten the emotion curve is due to the impact our emotions have on our health.  Neuroscientist Candace Pert explains in her book, Molecules of Emotion, “As our feelings change, this mixture of peptides travels throughout your body and your brain. And they’re literally changing the chemistry of every cell in your body.”

Our cells are fundamental building blocks of our physical being.  It is at this level where our health and well-being is determined.    It is said that 95% of dis-ease is stress related. If our cells are flooded with negativity,  negative chemistry will result. Impacting your cells from performing optimally.

As described by Hockenbury & Hockenbury, “An emotion is a complex psychological state that involves three distinct components: a subjective experience, a physiological response, and a behavioural or expressive response.”  

This means what you are fundamentally in charge of your emotional curve. What you are feeling is right for you. Based on what you have decided something to mean for you. Now I’m not saying that what you are thinking is necessarily correct, your perception will be your reality.

Most people deny how they are feeling, especially when it is typically considered to be negative. Yet when you deny, repress or do not allow an emotion you create a neurological block. A block not only to that negative emotion yet also to the equally opposite positive one.

Typically considered negative emotions, used correctly are healthy, as long as you don’t allow them to fester and spiral into them. There is a big difference in acknowledging how you are feeling and spiralling into that feeling.

Dissolving emotions

First step in flattening the emotional curve is to acknowledging how you feel and give yourself permission to feel that way. For example it is okay to be angry as long as you don’t spiral down (or out of control) with your anger

The next step is to endeavour to understand the reason you are feeling that way. I’m a great believer in not needing the know the why in order to heal; however it can assist. So if you can’t work it out, that too is okay.

Then you need to ask yourself what is it you need to dissolve the negative emotion (or heighten a positive one). Making sure you following through on doing whatever it is you need.

Other tools to help flatten the emotional curve are:

Meditation

Meditation is the act of contemplation, reflection and/or prayer where you focus your mind with the intention of slowing down that thoughts will rise and choosing to not engage with these thoughts.  

It is the process of be-ing; in that exact moment in time, free of busyness and distractions, not in the past and not in future, just present moment.

Like any new skill meditation can take time to master. So be compassionate with yourself when you start – it may you take you a few times before you are able to stop engaging with your thoughts.

To support your meditation process, try giving yourself another focus, such as your breath or music. A great breathing method for getting in to meditation is the 4-7-8 method. Breathe in for four, hold for seven and breathe out for eight. It helps relax you by shifting your from Sympathetic Nervous system (fight / flight response) to the Parasympathetic Nervous system (calm/composed state).

Another favourite suggestion for beginners is to light a candle and place your focus on the flame. Closing your eyes and then bringing the image of the flame into your mind. When your mind starts to wander open your eyes and focus on the physical flame, then closing your eyes again getting that image of the flame back in your minds eye. Continue doing so for the duration of the meditation.

Also start small…as in 5 or 10 minutes. Some is better than none.

Thymus Tapping

In Kinesiology we use thymus tapping to overall increase your energy levels as well as help energetically increase your capacity and ability to cope.  In addition it is believed to energetically increase your immune system.

To do this tap on the centre of your chest where your sternum is and at the same time tap on the side of your body in alignment with where the crease of your arm naturally falls. Do this for approx. 30 seconds on one side and then 30 seconds on the other. 

Focus of Concern / Focus of Influence

Stephen Covey in his book 7 Habits of Highly Effective People refers to the Circle of Influence v’s Circle of Concern.  Essentially it is about where you are placing your focus.  Are you focused on what is concerning you and getting bogged down by those concerns or are you focused on what action/s you can take to address what concerns you.

Focus of influence is about being empowered and proactive; to help you realise you have more power over things than you think.

Goals

Humans are teleological, which means we have a natural, inbuilt goal seeking drive.  If we are not out seeking our own goals we tend to help and support others to seek theirs. 

So having a goal, even if for the hour or day, sets your focus and intention on achieving something positive for yourself.

Journalling

James Pennebaker, a professor at the University of Texas undertook over forty years of research as to how journalling helped the individual to process significant emotional experiences.  His researched demonstrated that by spending 20 minutes per day journalling participants experienced significant improvements physically and mentally.

They indicated they were happier, more cheerful and hopeful and calmer.  Months after the journalling sessions their blood pressure had lowered, immune function impressed and overall felt healthier.   They also indicated their relationships had improved, their memory was better and were having more successes at work.

Journalling / writing allows us to step out from the problem and see it from another perspective.  Thus creating distance which can bring perspective about a situation.

Vitamin B & Iron

A scientific study from Japan found there is a significant correlation between panic/anxiety attacks and low levels of vitamin B6 and iron.

Serotonin, your body’s natural mood stabiliser and “happiness chemical”. It is synthesised in the body from the amino acid, tryptophan. For the synthesis of serotonin, vitamin B6 (Vit B6) and iron play important co-factors.

Thus increasing foods that are a source of tryptophan, Iron and Vitamin B could help improve your mindset. Foods that are a source of tryptophan are pumpkin seeds, turkey, grapefruit, tune, eggs, chia seeds, mozzarella sesame seeds and pistachios. Foods rich in Iron are spinach, red meat, lentils, cooked oysters, dark chocolate and white beans. Foods rich in Vitamin B6 are pork, turkey, fish, eggs, potato and bananas.

Protection

Just as you protect your physical body, it is important that we also protect and safeguard your energy fields in order to keep your energy clear of others energy and/or negative influences.

Energy which is not your own, especially when it is negative energy, can influence you resulting in stress, imbalance, mood swings, tiredness, lack of confidence, illness.  Such energy can actually depletes your own energy leaving you without the vitality you need for general living.

Daily we interact with EMF’s – electromagnetic fields which we can’t see yet are received with us.  Same too with energy.  When you interact with people, or even when passing by strangers,  your energy field connects or interacts with their energy field. This is why sometimes certain people can make you feel “off”.

Some of my favourite ways to protect my energy is essential oils such as Lavender or Frankincense, I also love the Resonate Essences Protection oil and I tend to use black tourmaline crystals to safeguard my energy fields.

If you found this helpful, be sure to head over to website for other articles full of tips and guidance.

Also if, after trying these techniques, you are still struggling with processing through your emotions then consider scheduling an appointment for kinesiology.  You can book an appointment with me via:  http://www.theinnersageaustralia.com/appointments/

Self Worth

Self worth ~ The foundation of empowerment

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The Merriam-Webster dictionary defines self worth as ” a sense of one’s own value as a human being”. It is interesting that this definition defines self worth on how a person sees themselves when in reality many people base their self worth on how they perceive others see them and/or how others treat them.

Whilst self worth is an internal “job” only you can decide if you are worthy or not. Often we have internalised other peoples perceptions and judgements to become our own. When this happens we’ve just made someone else an authority on ourselves. When we’ve made them an authority we’ve basically said they know us better than we know ourselves.

Once those perceptions and judgements have been taken on board we’ve then given them “references” or connected them so strong with emotion that they become our truth and our beliefs about ourselves. Beliefs about who we are, our beliefs as to what we do and don’t deserve and what we will and won’t accept.

Most of our belief and neurological patterns occur from the ages of two to seven.  At a time when we were unable to question what we were told, and when our parents are the most significant role models we have. Therefore the words they use (or don’t use), the actions they take (or don’t take), their reactions and non- reactions, all of which are teaching us and giving us conscious and unconscious messaging.

We then interact with the world by connecting with family, going to daycare, then school or even watching television.  All of which we discover other significant role models, who also can have a strong influence on us. Reinforcing our beliefs or supplement our beliefs by giving us new ones.

All of which is at an age when we did not have the necessary tools, nor resources to test the truisms of what we told, taught or shown.

Whilst beliefs can be created from various other sources, it is primarily significant people to whom we consciously or unconsciously give authority to regarding our self worth.

As a child or teenager it is understandable that we consider significant people in our lives as an authority ~ because they usually do have a role to discipline, decide what is right for us and give us orders. Yet as we grow into adulthood we don’t realise that we are most likely continuing to give their voice a platform.

As we mature we bring others into our lives in the form of friends and partners. People who whom we hold in strong regard and thus can have a strong influence on us and thus whom may impact our worthiness or lack thereof.

I recall in college an English teacher who told me that my writing was no good. As she was my teacher, an authority figure, I believed her. The way she also gave me this feedback, it seemed to me, that I would never be any good at it.

However I love writing. I love the creation aspect of it and it is something that gives me joy. It is something that when I am in the flow, I do so with ease. However what I realised was there was a block to me writing, instead I’d find other activities that “needed” doing.

Whilst it could be said I was procrastinating, it actually was this teacher’s words unconsciously playing in the background. Because whenever I went to write I became aware I was doubting the quality of my writing and whether any one would want to read it.

Another example of where my worth was dependant on a “significant other” was an ex-boyfriend who cheated several times during our relationship. I took his cheating as a sign that there was something wrong with me for him to do that.

In order to build your self worth you need to have awareness. Awareness of who are the significant other/s to whom you have, or are, giving a platform to. A platform for their voice and/or behaviours to mean more than your own.

The next step is consciously to take your power back from them. This is done by our “Calling your Spirit back” meditation ( http://innersagisms.thinkific.com/courses/calling-your-spirit-back-audio ).

Alternatively you can take your power back by knowing you have choice as to what you do and don’t listen to. I do this by simply saying to myself “I choose not to listen to those words any longer. I choose to listen to my own”.

You can also take your power back by re-framing what you made their actions or words mean. Re-framing is a method used to look at things from a different perspective to view a person, experience or situation in a more empowering way.

Taking the example of the teacher. As soon as I realised her words were playing in the background, I made a choice to no longer allow them to. I also re-framed this by understanding that what I wrote didn’t mean her expectations. Whilst it could have possibly needed work, it didn’t mean what I wrote was all “bad”.

Also in the example of the ex-boyfriend. We had chosen to be in a committed relationship and he didn’t maintain our agreement. It had nothing to do with me, it was about his choices. I stopped making his actions about me and instead identified his actions as reflective of him.

Significant others can trigger the creation of a belief about yourself and your worth, however you will have been seeking out references to support that belief. To help release these references you want to question their validity yet also seek out references where the opposite is true.

Using the example of the teacher, such alternative references are the many clients who’ve told me how much they love my articles and how much they help them. I’ve also been approached by publications asking me if they can use my articles. Other references are the articles which have been published.

The more references you seek out that reflect your self worth then the stronger that belief will be. The less you engage in sabotaging patterns and behaviours, the more your self worth will increase.

Your worth is within you. Stop giving others the power to affect how you feel about your self. Go within and from inside out build your own worth. Be your authority on who you are and the value you bring. Do this by knowing yourself – knowing who you are and loving all of that; knowing you are not and loving all of that also!

Calling your spirit back

Calling your Spirit back

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The concept of calling your Spirit back is explained divinely with a story that Caroline Myss shares in her book, “Anatomy of the Spirit” about David Chetlahe Paladin, a Navajo Indian who grew up on a reservation in the 1920’s and ’30’s.

The loss of David’s spirit began at age eleven which saw him become an alcoholic, then in his mid-teens he would leave the reservation to drift and wander until he got a job on a merchant marine ship.  It was on this ship that David befriended a young German man as well as another Native American.

The young men worked and travelled together throughout the Pacific Ocean and to keep himself entertained David took up drawing, often sketching bunkers that the Japanese were building on various Pacific Islands in 1941.

David’s drawings, including those of the Japanese bunkers, found their way into the hands of the American military and he was drafted into military service.  David assumed he skills as an artist would be utilised however instead he was assigned to be a part of a secret operation which would see him, as well as other Native Americans, become spy’s.

As radio transmissions had the possibility of being intercepted, the American Army devised a plan to use Native Americans, for their native language, as a means to guarantee that transmissions could not be interpreted.

It was while David was behind enemy lines, that he would be caught by the Nazi’s.  They tortured him in many ways, including nailing his feet to the floor and then forcing him to stand for days on end.

David survived the torture and was sent for execution by genocide because he was considered a “lesser race”.  While being shoved into a train carriage for his journey, he felt a rifle being pushed into his ribs, he turned to face the solder who turned out to be his German friend from the merchant ship.

David’s friend orchestrated for him to change trains and be sent to a prisoner of war camp instead, where David would see out the remainder of the war.  When the camps would be liberated, David was found by American soldiers unconscious and dying.   He was transported to a military hospital in the United States where he would remain in a coma for two and half years.

When David finally came out of the coma, his body was so weak he could not walk without assistance.   David decided that he would enter a veteran’s hospital and see out the rest of his life, yet before he did that he would return to his reservation to say goodbye to his people.

When David returned to the reservation, he friends and family were in shock at the state of him.  So horrified they convened to discus how they could help him.  The reservation elders approached David, took off his leg braces, tied a rope to his waist and through him into a deep river.  They commanded “David, call your spirit back, Your spirit is no longer in your body. If you can’t call your spirit back, we will let you go. No one can live without his spirit. Your spirit is your power.”

David would tell Caroline that calling his spirit back was the most difficult tasks he ever had to undertake.  “It was more difficult than enduring having my feet nailed to the floor. I saw the faces of those Nazi soldiers. I lived through all those months in the prison camp. I knew that I had to release my anger and hatred. I could barely keep myself from drowning, but I prayed to let the anger out of my body. That’s all I prayed, and my prayers were answered.”

David would fully recovered including the full use of his legs.  He would become a shaman healer, Christian minister and very talented artist before passing away in 1986.

David’s story reminds us of how experiences can drain our life force and capture our spirit.  Yet more importantly that we can transcend any situation to call back the energy which has been taken from us.

Experiences that capture our spirit don’t have to be as traumatic as David’s, they can be divorce or separation from someone we loved, jealousy of others, negativity, grieving the loss of a person, place or thing, major transitions or rejection of a part of ourselves.

We can also give our spirit away when we make someone or something more important than ourselves, it is any situation which leaves you less than who you are meant to be.

Ways to Call back your spirit

With whatever method you choose, it is important to make this a ritualistic exercise, therefore set aside an appropriate amount of time where you won’t be interrupted or rushed.  Create a sacred space in whatever way it makes it inviting, safe and special for you.  Some ideas are to light candles, sage the room or burn incense, use essential oils, music or drumming and perhaps crystals.

Meditation with visualisation
Get yourself into a comfortable position which you can easily hold for an amount of time.  Bring  your focus to your breathe, breathing in for a count of 4, holding for a count of 7 and exhaling for a count of 8.  Allowing any thoughts to just be, giving them permission to present and then just be, not adding to them or exploring them.

Feeling yourself relax, letting go and being in the moment.  Now set your intention for the meditation, for all parts of your spirit which have been left with other people, in other places, in other times, at events to return for you to be 100% restored and revitalised right now.

Envisage a pulsating ball of cleansing energy surrounding you, once which surrounds your physical body covering your head and connecting below your feet, one which also extends from your physical body to extend to encompass all your energy fields..

As you feel, see or hear your intention being acted upon now visualise (or feel) the energy which you have left with others being returned to you and as it does being cleansed passing through the cleansing ball of energy you have set around you, ensuring that only your energy returns to you and any residue from others is removed.

As you see or feel the stream of your light energy return to you feel your energy levels increasing, feel your inner strength return and a sense of being 100% home within  yourself.

Take a moment to soak in this energy, to let your returned energy reverberate and immerse so you are fully bonded.  When you are ready slowly come back to the room, raising your awareness to the noises that surround you, wriggling your fingers and toes, feeling the floor around you.

Prayer
Ask God, the Universe, Budda or whomever you believe in or pray (speak) to and ask for their assistance in returning your energy, which has been left in other places, time, events or with people to return to you.

Be 100% confident that your prayers will be heard and that the action will be taken to assist in what is yours, being returned to you.

Command
Commanding your energy to report is similar to yet stronger than a prayer, as you are not relying on external support yet rather authoritatively directing your energy to return.

State out loud “I call back my spirit.  I command all fragments of my spirit left in other places, times and dimension or with other people and events to return to me right now.  As those parts of my spirit integrate in my being, they are cleansed and revitalised, invigorating and renewing my spirit as a whole”

In the times that I have found the need to call back my own spirit, I have felt a shift in my energy and a return of inner strength.  It has enabled me to let go of matters that were playing in my head and that were lowering my vibration.

Calling back your spirit is a beautiful, simple yet compelling way to transcend your pain and to connect with the grace of true empowerment.